Being a single mom is no easy task. It's a tough job that requires strength and resilience to tackle the daily challenges that come with it. As a single mom, you're expected to take on the responsibilities of both parents while often having to cope with less financial, emotional, and physical support. From learning how to juggle multiple roles to struggling to find balance between parenting and work, being a single mom is not for the faint of heart. In this blog post, we’ll discuss 10 things no one tells you about being a single mom - the good, the bad, and the sometimes ugly.
1) You're always tired
Being a single mom is a demanding job. You not only have to manage your own responsibilities but also provide for your child and often times, be both the mother and father figure in their lives. This means that you are almost always exhausted. The exhaustion can be physical, mental and emotional, as you have to take on all of the roles of a parent, as well as manage other aspects of your life. This can lead to a feeling of never having enough time in the day or feeling overwhelmed with the amount of tasks you have to complete. The lack of rest and energy needed to stay focused on your tasks can lead to feelings of exhaustion and burnout. Unfortunately, there is no one else you can lean on or turn to when you need a break or an extra set of hands.
2) You have to be everything to your child
Being a single mom is a challenging job, and one of the most difficult parts is being everything to your child. You’re the mother and the father, the teacher and the disciplinarian, the provider and the protector, all at once. This means that you have to wear many hats and juggle multiple responsibilities at once – something that can be incredibly taxing and difficult to manage.
It’s also important to note that since you’re often handling all of these roles on your own, you may need to make some tough decisions. You have to decide which activities are best for your child, how to budget money and create a routine that works for your family. All of these things can be emotionally and mentally draining and require a lot of time, energy, and effort.
It’s not easy being everything to your child, but it’s also one of the most rewarding experiences you can have. When you have the strength and resilience to handle all of these responsibilities alone, you’re providing your child with the kind of love and stability that will last a lifetime.
3) People judge you
Being a single mom can be hard, and it can be made even harder by the fact that you may feel judged by those around you. Whether you’re a single mom by choice or due to circumstance, it’s not uncommon to feel like your parenting choices are being scrutinized. From close friends and family to complete strangers, judgment can come from all directions. It can be incredibly difficult to have to deal with these opinions and judgments, as well as the expectations that are often placed upon you as a single mom.
It is important to remember that you are the one who knows what’s best for your child and your family, and no one else should be making those decisions for you. Don’t let other people’s opinions make you doubt yourself or make you feel like you’re not doing enough. There is no right or wrong way to be a single mom, so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
4) You're constantly worried
Being a single mom can often be overwhelming, and the constant worry of caring for your child without a partner can be daunting. You may find yourself worrying about the future, your financial stability, your child's health, their academic performance, and many other things. Even if you have a strong support system in place, it doesn't take away the fact that you are solely responsible for your child's wellbeing. As a single mom, you have to make sure your child has all their needs met while dealing with all of your own. It can be emotionally exhausting to constantly worry about providing for your child and making sure everything is taken care of.
5) You have no time for yourself
Being a single mom is hard enough, but when you factor in the fact that you have no time for yourself, it can become even more challenging. When your sole responsibility is taking care of another human being, it can be easy to forget about your own needs and wants. When there’s only one of you, there’s not enough time to rest and recharge, or even just do something for yourself. As a single mom, you may feel like you’re constantly running on empty, and that can take a toll on your mental and physical health.
When you don’t have someone to share the load with, everything falls on you. You are responsible for providing food, clothing, shelter, and love for your child, and these are all important things that can’t be ignored. You may also need to work to provide for your family, adding yet another layer of stress to an already difficult situation. All of these responsibilities can leave you feeling overwhelmed and exhausted with no time for yourself.
Making time for yourself as a single mom is essential for your wellbeing, but it isn’t always easy. It may feel selfish to take even a few moments for yourself when you have so many other responsibilities to attend to. But making time for yourself is key to staying mentally and physically healthy. Even if it’s just a few minutes a day to take a walk outside or read a book, taking that time can make a huge difference.
6) You can't afford to be sick
When you're a single parent, being sick is a luxury that you simply can't afford. You can't take time off of work, you can't call in sick and you don't have anyone to take care of your child. You have to muster up all of your energy and power through the day. You might have to push through exhaustion, headaches, fever and other sickness symptoms, because there simply isn't anyone else to help. On top of all this, there are usually expensive medical bills that come with being sick. For single moms, it's a double-edged sword that makes taking care of your health especially difficult.
7) You feel guilty all the time
Being a single mom is hard, and guilt often comes along with it. You may feel guilty for not being able to provide all the things that your child needs or wants, or for not having enough time to spend with them. You might also feel guilty for not having the same relationship with your child that a two-parent household does, or for feeling overwhelmed by the responsibilities you have to shoulder as a single parent. On top of this, you might feel guilty for taking time away from your child when you go out and have fun, or even for just needing a break from parenting. All of this guilt can add up, leaving you feeling like you’re failing as a parent, no matter how much you love your child.
8) Dating is difficult
Being a single mom can make it hard to find time to date. You may feel guilty for leaving your child with a babysitter or family member so that you can go out. There’s also the worry that if you do find someone, they won’t want to date a single mom and may not accept your child. On the other hand, dating someone who isn’t used to having kids around can be a challenge, as well. Dating is hard enough when you don’t have the responsibility of caring for a child, let alone trying to juggle both responsibilities. It takes a lot of patience and compromise to make it work.
9) You have to put your child first
Being a single mom often means sacrificing your own needs and desires to focus on the well-being of your child. This can be a difficult and exhausting task, especially when it feels like there are never enough hours in the day to do it all. It’s important to remember that your child's happiness and security should always come first. That means taking time out for yourself may not always be possible. You might have to make decisions based on what’s best for your child instead of what would make you happy. This can be difficult but ultimately it’s worth it in the end. Your child’s health and happiness is more important than anything else. When you put your child first, you’re teaching them how to be selfless and how to think of others before themselves.
10) It's worth it
Being a single mom is tough, and often times it can feel like an insurmountable task. But even in the toughest of times, it's important to remember that it's worth it.
Your child will always be grateful for your hard work and dedication. The love, support and guidance you provide will shape who they become and help them become a better version of themselves. While it may be hard now, seeing your child grow up and thrive will make it all worth it.
Moreover, you're setting a great example for your child. You're showing them that they can do anything if they put their minds to it. You're proving that even when life gets hard, you can overcome any obstacle.
You are a superhero – one that deserves recognition, respect and appreciation for the hard work you put in every day. As a single mom, you have taken on a challenge that few would dare try and you should be proud of yourself for doing so.
You are your kids hero
When you’re a single mom, it can be hard to remember that you are your child’s hero. You may have days where you feel like giving up, but the truth is that you are their one and only. As a single mom, you provide your child with all the love and support they need. You’re their rock and they look up to you for guidance and direction.
You show them how to be strong even in the toughest of times. You teach them that it’s okay to make mistakes and that it’s possible to pick yourself up and start again. You’re there when they need someone to talk to or to give them a hug. They learn from watching your actions, how to be kind, patient and forgiving.
Your children will look back on the challenges that life throws at you and take away the strength and courage you have shown through it all. They will carry this with them for the rest of their lives. They will see you as their role model, their source of courage, and the one who has showed them that no matter what, they can always keep going.
Your resilience, strength, determination and courage is an inspiration to your kids. They may not tell you often enough, but they admire you more than you can ever imagine. They know that with you by their side, they can conquer any obstacle that comes their way. You are your child’s hero!